I was talking to a friend of ours the other day, and he mentioned how he had decided that before his son was born, that he would be able to freely admit that his baby was ugly and looked like an alien. I totally related with this because I knew I could be honest and not have any bias towards my own daughter. When she was born, I really thought, "I am being totally subjective (is that the right word or is it objective--it's late and I am really getting confused here), but I really can say in all the world I have never laid eyes on a more beautiful baby! Angelina and Brad have nothing on us. Niev is way cuter than their puffy-lipped baby!"
Now I look back at Niev's baby pictures and I do realize that she was not as cute as I thought she was...now don't get me wrong, she was beautiful, but not as adorable as she is now. Her adorable smile, squinty bright blue eyes and high-pitched squeal are my Achilles heel. She was sweet as a baby and now she is a real kicker. I can't think of anyone else besides Ian that I would want to spend an hour with. After we put her to bed at night, I am still relieved, but within an hour or two, I want to wake her up and have her play with us. She is really the happiest baby to be around. What a joy!
To think that a year of her life has already zipped by is kind of sobering. To think that I have spent over 365 days of my life with her and some of that time is spent with me watching TV and her playing by herself. Or even more frightening, me losing my patience with her because I didn't want to take ten minutes out of my day to hold her close/read/play and all she was doing was wanting attention. I understand I am human, but tonight I was thinking of her and how much she has grown and how fast she will continue to grow and it awakened me to the parent I WANT to become. Guilt is a positive if we change because of it! Just since July, she has changed so much. Observe:
Here are two pictures that were taken in July! That was only six months ago.
And here is a picture of her taken this week. She is no longer my chub monster. I can't waste another day of this precious time.